On Communication

The Problem

I have not been doing too well with communication as of late. That might even be a serious understatement.

As I am making this foray into wanting to be taken seriously as the GM of the guild, by both myself and others, I know that communication is one place that I am going to need a lot of work. The funny thing is, I don’t think it’s always because I choose the wrong words to try to get my point across, but can often be due to the fact that I, being a person who appreciates bluntness, will try to be blunt myself.

Whether I like it or not, there are just too many people who don’t see the value of straightforward, no bullshit, callin’ it as I see it communication. Ohh, there I go again!

One of my personal heroes and someone that I actually rather aspire to be like, is an anonymous blogger who ran this site here for a good, long while. V might be less anonymous now, I don’t know. I never cared who she was in the flesh because it was her powerful voice and her fearless, no bullshit attitude that made me want to read what she had to say, whether I agreed with her or not.

The problem is, that doesn’t mesh well with many people in my guild, for whatever reason.

Whatever. I have ideas on how to get around it.

But while I’ve been working on implementing those ideas, I haven’t been able to help but wonder why I am apparently more offensive now than I ever was when I would draft statements for At during times of drama and crisis, or even just simple organizing.

Now, we never really floated it around back then that I had been the one to write up something like 95% of the “State of the Guild Addresses” or “Quit whining because this is why things are how they are” type statements. Because I enjoy writing and am frankly better at it than At is, I would write up whatever it was that needed to be communicated and send it to him so he could look it over, tweak anything he wanted to tweak and then post it under his name.

The response was usually quite positive to those communications. Comments like “This is the best and most clear way I have ever seen this laid out,” quietly warmed the cockles of my frozen heart.

And I really don’t want to be the type of person to play the gender card and call unfair bias, but it does sometimes really seem that if you take a strong stance as a female, you’re a bitch. If you have a wiener, well, you’re just being a good leader. Not always, not by any stretch. But there is this dichotomy between my experiences of leading behind At’s throne, so to speak, and leading on my own merits.

So now what?

I know that one thing I need to change in my communication now that I am “really” the GM is to always strive for a professional tone when I have the GM hat on.

Frankly, I think this sucks. It just feels so politically correct to me and the whole PC mentality is one that can go die in a fire as far as I am concerned. But here I am, at least attempting to appear as though I buy into it in hopes that my way will be eased somewhat.

But here on this site, where I’m speaking as “Alas” and nothing more, I won’t do it. This website isn’t required reading for the guild and I have not even given the URL to anyone who hasn’t asked for it, except that one time I shoved it at Azzah but he doesn’t count. Because he still has not given me any totems to make love to. So while I will be working on being less abrasive in game and on the forums, here’s what needs to be understood about this space:

I do hang up my GM hat before I come in here. Do I talk about leadership and bemoan the breathtaking stupid I see in raids? Yeah. But it’s not meant to be taken as anything more than me blowing off steam and anyone who finds reason to cry about something I might say in the future will be pointed back to this post. This is my space, dammit, and I will use it how I want to. If you don’t like it, go buy your own domain and write about what a jerk I am, I don’t care.

In the spirit of wanting to be more like “V” I might tackle some ideas I’ve been kicking around but haven’t posted because I know from a mile away that they could be controversial. That’s right, I might be comparing church to guilds (it works, trust me) and political parties to certain player mentalities. My intent won’t be to offend anyone – these are merely thoughts I’ve found interesting to turn over in my own mind. But I have no doubt people will be offended by it if I get it wrong in execution.

If anyone decides to get into an argument with me here over whatever, I might play for a while. But I’m tired of circular arguments and bullshit rationalizations, so don’t count on me playing nice. I’ll be as blunt as I like and call you out on whatever I can.

In other words, warts and all, you can expect to find just me here and I won’t take any lip about it..

Comments

On Communication — 6 Comments

  1. Idk, most of my working career I have had a female boss. Never had a problem with it and honestly never treated them any differently than a male boss.

    Sounds like you yourself may have a chip on your shoulder because I haven’t seen or heard anything from anyone that would make me believe that they don’t take you seriously as the GM of the guild.

  2. @RGraham

    I think you missed the point. All she is saying is that this is where she is going to blow off steam. If you don’t like it, don’t read it. For “official communication” see the guild site. That said, if Alas rants about someone’s stupid, and it sounds like it’s my stupid, I will ask and see what I can do differently, cause I don’t like being boiled in oil, and we know Alas likes to boil the stupid off.

  3. Oh. Emm. Gee. Noxy got something right!

    This post is NOT about QQ, I’mma girl and that makes my life haaaaard.

    It is about this is my space so if you don’t like what you see here, go away.

  4. At least we have it in written form that it actually occurred, with time and date stamps and everything.

  5. LOL, ok.

    Only problem is few if any of this makes it to guild where it should be. oh well.. see ya

    : )