…or how playing WoW can prepare one for a life of tedious employ.
1. Repeat, repeat, repeat, re- …fuck this
I mentioned yesterday that Kooky kept trying to pull me off one project to stick me on another. About the fifth time she did that, I wanted to say: Lissen lady! I farmed a goddamn druid all the way from 80-85 (nearly) on the strength of mining and herbing alone! And you know what I did after that? Do you? I mined and herbed some more. Don’t talk to me about boring, repetitious jobs. Don’t talk to me about needing a break!
2. Repeat, repeat, repeat, re- …fuck this… again
Dragging my sorry carcass out of bed knowing what barely-warmed-over Hell was in store for me was pretty much the most difficult thing I had to do this week. The commute in the cold… the eight hours of work… the commute back in the rain… on public transport… with the public… in dress clothes… (I shudder to think of it all, stretching out for endless months.)
Ah, but I have faced the dailies of more than a dozen rep grinds, from the Ogri’La to Baradin’s Wardens. I have contrived to raise over 45 reputations to exalted. If I can force myself to collect rusty guns and kill 15 demons every day for a paltry reward, then I can convince myself to face the public and the cold and the tedious work for a paltry paycheck.
3. 10-key skills
I have them. I have such mad 10-key skills you don’t even know. Because I am smart and savvy and a GM and I protect my account with an authenticator. It’s the right thing to do. When I see those 5-digit codes at work, I scoff on the inside. Because every time I log into WoW you know I am punching that 6-digit code and a password. Every time. I’m awesome like that.
4. Putting up with rampant disorganization
Three foot tall stacks of paper notwithstanding, the disorganization of an office environment is peanuts compared to trying to lead a raid to kill the leaders of the filthy horde. Especially when you PUG half the people needed and most of them are know-it-all prima donnas who can’t work out how to follow the goddamn star as that is the tank who will take the beating for them.
Sometimes – most of the time – the only proper response is to take a deep breath and wade into the fray, weapons swinging. Even if it a Swingline stapler.
5. Working with the group
You learn to identify broad types in a pug fairly quickly. That’s the 12-year old dps who is hopped up on either a potent sugar/caffeine cocktail or speed. That’s the sour healer who is there mostly to complain about how healers don’t get no respect these days and get off my lawn! That’s the jocky tank who thinks that the size of his.. ahem… hp is all that matters. Yeah.
It’s the same thing in an office. That guy thinks he’s the leader but it’s really just that he talks a lot while his second-in-command quietly marks the kill and CC targets. That lady think she is massively overworked just because she has to trap at least one mob per every pull. That one over there is the idiot temp who knows she is running with a guild team she would never want to be a part of and who just may try to aggro the auditors just before dropping group.
Shouldn’t have rolled need on those benefits just to deny the temp, yo.